The latest celebrity fad for eating roasted budgies means that demand has skyrocketed throughout the Kingdom.
Sadly, this has led to a severe shortage of edible budgies in the region. (Parakeets just don’t taste the same).
Endorsements by top TV chefs like Jammy Oliver, Gordo Ramsons and Anthony Warthole-Thompson have only made things worse.
As meat suppliers to Warts and Clunts as far back as 2015, InterMeats needs to be at the forefront of any meat craze, regardless of any damage to the environment.
Hence the need for freelance professional Budgie Smugglers. As these rare Budgies now must be smuggled in via Gibraltar, the ideal candidates must be very good swimmers (especially in the dark).
Full qualifications in Teaching Aquatics (level 1), Aqua Fitness and Disabilities training (level 2), Diving, Synchronised Swimming and Water Polo (Level 42) are required plus an RSPB Bird-Keeping permit or licence fully recognised by Animalicious Pet Shop and Gimpchester Zoo.
10 years of experience in smuggling budgies wearing speedos is also a requirement (but not a deal-breaker).
For more details please contact Mike Rotch.
Warts City meat suppliers, InterMeats, don’t just supply meat. They hunt it and kill is as well!
In the meat business since 1768, InterMeats are the whole package. If you order lamb chops on Monday at 9am, InterMeats’ professionally trained ex-Army hitmen will shoot the animal within the hour and have it skinned and chopped by lunchtime. You can’t get fresher than that. (Please note that Elephants and Giraffes might take a bit longer).